Blog Booms and Ego Envy

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Blogs are booming everywhere. The installation of privacy has now gone public. Air you rants and live for the next click, browse, comment and reply. Insidious, no?
And here I am, regaling in the comforts of this new 'recruitment'.

Will it compete for attention amongst the millions of others out there ...
I do not know, I've never keen on competition though I have accounts that say otherwise. The intention is was never about competition but the road to Heck is paved with Every Intention.

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Ego Envy.
What an interesting and common notion.
So hear my confession.

"I've never been ambitious, at least enver quite as my peers in my history. But I've had a fair notion of jealousy and envy. Its all good in the end and I'm genuinely glad the people who'd made it, have ... well, made it. I'm pretty sure they work damn well hard for it too.
But a part of my mind wonders if its really all about luck and the right combination of looks and cultural requirements'. Luck, is inferred to timing.

Its begins with those low-esteem-ish like queries. Maybe we've all had them at different points of our lives, year, weeks or day. Aren't I good enough? Application: Universal from relationships to careers. But its ranges from "What's wrong with me?" to "What's wrong with them?"

Case in point:
Adam Carruthers (8tv, Hitz Radio DJ) and William Quah (post VJ, TV Host) (Malaysian Celebrities under 22) (Note: Not a BASH)

They have the look that television requires, (I guess I dont *wails), they fulfill the pan-asian facade (well, I'm in the shitters there too), they speak with an acquired ... accent which seems to give the impression of well spoken English (and yes, they are well spoken and have a great command of the english language). Well, la dee la.
Curse their genes, timing, connections and good luck.

In all probability, their auditions went well, their headshots were impressive, they didn't choke on camera, they looked great on screen (and real life, it never hurts in real life), they sound great (some might say utterly schem-xy) and they are young and ambitious.

I'm torn between hating them for their good fortune (they work hard I reiterate but it wouldn't have been so without a measure of the right timing and people), wondering why I couldn't do the same thing and wanting to sleep with them. :/ "

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I sound bitter and horny.

I'm not above being bitter and horny. I will admit.I do have litte to no ambition whatsoever, but I wouldn't trade in whatever history I've had (though its nice to wonder). Its different, probably not as glamourous (this would include the hassle of being a celebrity coz glam is spam), but it'll do. Like the pig in the farm, it'll do.

It'll do.